Hank, holy crap! You and me and the Nerdfighters raised many, many thousands of dollars for Kiva.org over the weekend. Hey Hank, do you remember in my video on Thursday when I said that we couldn't personally open a microfinance bank because it takes really wealthy people to open a microfinance bank, and so instead we would have to rely on Kiva.org?
It turns out that when I said that, I was forgetting about the law of compound Nerdfighting! The law of compound Nerdfighting is sort of similar to the law of compound interest which, Hank, I'm sure you remember from when Dad tried to tell us about it a million times when we were kids. As far as I can remember, the law of compound interest states that you have to put a little bit of money in the bank when you're a kid, and then by the time you're old, it's become a lot of money. And the reason for that is this very complex fiscal thing known as magic.
The law of compound Nerdfighting is similar in that it also involves magic. The law of compound Nerdfighting states that 100 Nerdfighters as a group can do things that 100 Nerdfighters as individuals could not do. (image of T-shirt) In this example seen in this t-shirt that you own, Hank, we see that 100 Nerdfighters together can beat up a popular kid. By the way, Hank, I've been thinking that maybe the opposite of Nerdfighter is Decepticon. Do you like it?
What I learned this weekend is that we actually probably could have started a microfinance bank if we'd only known about the law of compound Nerdfighting, because people were extremely generous. I mean, we have funded a lot of loans now, and over the course of next week, we're going to continue to fund loans. And we're going to fund loans like crazy! We're gonna help people open bakeries and shoe stores. The other day we helped a guy who wanted to start a lasso factory. A lasso factory? That's so awesome! How come I didn't think of that?
But there's only one problem, Hank. The Nerdfighters are probably getting kind of tapped out. What we need is more Nerdfighters. Hank, I never really craved more Nerdfighters until this weekend. I mean, there's plenty of people out there who are Nerdfighters who just don't know about the term yet. Hank, what we have is an acute Nerdfighter shortage! We gotta do something about this. Hank, I think broadly speaking, there are four kinds of people in the world. First, you have your Decepticons, you know, not Nerdfighters. Then you have your Nerdfighters, you know, me, you, Tobias, Otter, all the commenters, all the people who hang out in My Pants, all the people who write Nerdfighting songs, that kind of thing. Then you've got what I like to call your Nerdfighters-In-Training, or your NiTs. Your NiTs are your lurkers, your occasional viewers, that kind of thing. Then you've got people who would be Nerdfighters, but they don't even know what a Nerdfighter is yet. That's very troubling, Hank, because those are the people who could be giving to Kiva.org to pick up where the current Nerdfighters are having to leave off because they're out of money to lend.
So Hank, what I'm gonna propose is a series of mass promotions! First, we have to promote the Nerdfighters to being Senior Executive Nerdfighters. Then, we're going to promote the NiTs to being Nerdfighters. Then, we're going to take all the people who do not yet know that they are Nerdfighters, and we are gonna promote them to NiTs! Hank, we have to find a way to tell these people that they're NiTs. And then we have to tell them to loan money to Kiva.org because the law of compound Nerdfighting says it clearly, Hank, the more there are of us, the fewer there will be of them. I'll see you tomorrow.
(Brotherhood 2.0 logo) Hank, speaking of us and them, there's an interesting conversation about post-colonial theory going on in the comments. That's the kind of thing that maybe we could talk about in My Pants. Oh, and that's one more difference between people who aren't Nerdfighters and people who are NiTs and people who are Nerdfighters. People who aren't yet Nerdfighters are like, (talking into pants) Why is that guy talking about post-colonial theory in his pants? And then people who are NiTs are like, Oh man, I should really join that forum. And people who are Nerdfighters are already starting the thread.
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