June 1: Barack Saabama

Good morning John, It's Friday June 1st. I don't have time for it to be June yet! Why was May so short? Stupid May. My life is slipping away. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. BONG. BONG. BONG. Slipping through my fingers.
What I mean to say is life's too short for brothers to be angry at each other. Which is why you're just going to have to admit you're wrong. Your response to my derision of Barack Obama was maybe a little bit unconvincing. I said that he was well-spoken and attractive, to that list you added "smart" Ummm. I think that we might have to admit that Brotherhood 2.0 is not going to be able to endorse a candidate in the 2008 elections. Because we might not be voting for the same person. I mean, I'll vote for Barack Obama if he's running against Mitt Romney, but I might not vote for Barack Obama if he's running against John McCain.
This country has a lot of problems, and Barack Obama has a lot of good ideas, but you can't sit there and tell me that a candidate is "smart" if he wants to increase the amount of carbon dioxide that our automobile fleet produces. By OVER 100%! That's not smart. That's uh, that's stupid.
Liquid coal is an extremely bad idea. It's the exact opposite of everything I work for. While I recognize that there are a lot of issues, that are important to me, and maybe should even be more important to me, than global warming, this is what I do. It's what I care about the most. It's what I spend all of my time doing and I just can't support some one who is not only a supporter, but like the congressional champion on the Democratic side. I like it when he talks, it makes me happy. When Hilary Clinton talks it makes me nauseous. But that is not a reason to vote for a candidate.
Obviously what's worse is that there are so many cars in America. We don't need them all. Frankly I think that I need one less. (pulls out 100 dollar bill, puts in mouth) that was me yesterday, putting my money where my mouth is. John, you may already be angry at me, but I might be about to make you more angry at me. I'll let Yesterday Self tell you about that so you can be angry at him instead of me.
(Yesterday Self) Katherine and I have become a one car family. (holds up $100) And there's a certain advantage to becoming a one car family. 90 of these. That's two, this is 88. (fans out 100s, bites stack) We have sold the less fuel efficient of the two cars, also the much more expensive of the two cars. I very intentionally video taped this yesterday so that no one would know that I have this much money until I put it in the bank. Which I'm about to go do. So don't come over and try to rob me, because I've already deposited it. This kinda scares the crap out of me. At the same time I just kinda want to rub it on myself. (rubs on face) ooohhh.
It's hard to be down on losing a really nice car when you've got your hand full of 88 hundred dollar bills.  (adds two) I mean, 90. 90 hundred dollar bills. So, uh, maybe I'm just gonna invest it all in solar stocks. I have faith in the solar power industry.
(Today self) Man, that guy is such a jerk. He totally sold the Saab, you love the Saab! I don't believe he did that. Make sure that he knows he's done you wrong, but I'm on your side, I'm all behind you on all the different reasons why you're angry, we should be friends.
Thank you for challenging me to make a forum, I'm workin on it, and I challenge you to move to Indianapolis cause right now I don't think you need anything else on your plate. John, I'll see you on Monday.