Wednesday, November 3

April 3rd: Seattle!

Good morning, John. It’s Tuesday, April something. I’m in Washington. There’s wind turbines. I think wind turbines are pretty, but a lot of people seem to think that wind turbines are ugly and so they don’t want to put them on mountain ridges. But I don’t understand that. The third. It’s…it’s the third.
(looking at a metal tree) We went to Seattle to see some friends and for no other reason besides that. Well, we also wanted to see a comedy show (shows a clip) and, you know, eat some real food (cooked ducks) and do things that you can only do in a big city. Like drive. (some tunnels) Yeah, there was a lot of driving. Saw the Space Needle…from a car.
One of the awesomest parts of Seattle is the public market. (shows some clips of public market activities) Which is sort of a three-story-deep market with all kinds of strange things in it. Like, there’s street performers and there’s fish with stuff in their mouths. And people throwing fish, throwing fish around like crazy. Lots of ‘em. And then there was this girl, and she asked if they’d ever hit someone with a fish, and they said, “Well, not on purpose.” And she didn’t believe them, so they showed her.
And then there was this donut-making machine which was awesome and obviously has been there longer than Krispy Kreme has ever existed. And this guy who was just a wizard with donuts. I tell ya, a wizard. I’m pretty sure that there aren’t very many donut wizards, but this guy, uh, is pretty much the definition of donut wizard.
(in room) They were really good donuts, too. So I gotta say thanks to everybody in Seattle, everybody, that’s…that’s everybody. And if there’s any of you watching, thanks. Seattle is a great town. On top of that, special thanks go to Ashley, Jason, Brian, and Becca for showing us around the town and giving us a place to sleep and letting us play their video game. It was an awesome weekend, and I need an awesome weekend. I’m back home and facing punishment.
You know, you can have the best job in the world, but some days you’ll wake up and you won’t want to go to work. That’s just what work is. No one would pay you to do something that you’d just do anyway. This morning, I woke up, and I’m very sorry to you, John, and to all of our viewers. I didn’t want to make a video. I wanted to lay in bed all day. We had a really bad drive home. The pass was pretty much covered in two inches of ice. And it was very stressful even though I wasn’t even driving. Eh…Thank you, Katherine; oh, my God.
Yeah, this morning, I just…I wanted to stay in bed. We’d had too much fun this weekend and I didn’t want to get up. I didn’t want to do it. I didn’t want to make TV. I wanted to watch TV. And I did; I watched a little bit of TV, and it was good. And now I’m up, and I’m going, and I’m making a video. You know? I’m doing it. I’m showing you what happened in Seattle. And that’s good footage, that’s good stuff. And I’m making it. And you know I’m, I’m happy about it. And I’m glad that I kicked myself out of bed to do it, even though it’s, like, 6:00 in the evening now.
Thank you to the one person who has stuck up for me. And giving that $10 to the Campaign to Decrease Suck Levels Worldwide, that was very kind, but there’s only one of you, and I need 19 more before we can really get me off the hook here. So, I’d like to see those start rollin in. And, if not, I’m gonna have to figure out a punishment to do for Thursday. Obviously I haven’t figured out which punishment I’m going to do. You’re all just going to have to wait and see.
John, I’ll see you tomorrow.

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