Hank, I just got to my hotel room in Kalamazoo, Michigan. And you know what was waiting for me here? Strawberry hill, peeps, and nerds. Thanks, Kalamazoo.
And all evening long I've been thinking to myself: What is it that America wants to see me do with Nerds, Peeps and a bottle of strawberry hill? And then I realized: what America wants to know is whether or not a peep will float in a glass of strawberry hill.
Will it float? It floats! Look! It's a little ducky on a pink pond.
So there you have it, Hank. Peeps float in strawberry hill! "But wait", you say, "do nerds?" Hank, as you can see, I have a lot of grape nerds. And now, we're going to test them.
hmm... That looks delicious. Well Hank, the answer is that nerds do not float. Except for the lone nerd that attached itself to the peep. Smart nerd.
Hank, many people say that brotherhood 2.0 is not educational. But I would argue that it is educational. Because now we've all learned an important lesson, which is that if you find yourself in the open ocean, with 1000 peeps and 1000 nerds, you should cling to the peeps and let the nerds go. In profoundly disturbing news, it seems like strawberry hill turns purple nerds white. Let that be a lesson to all of you. If strawberry hill can strip purple nerds from their color, just think what it can do to a gastro-intestinal system.
(sings) S-s-something from the comments... we're gonna miss you Ze.
Peter writes: "what if your effort to decrease suck-levels actually makes suck-levels increase? What is the contingency plan? We need an exit strategy here!" Hank, just like Peter I'm profoundly concerned that we might accidently increase suck levels. If you think about it most of the suckiest things that ever happened started with an attempt to decrease suck levels. Like, for instance, you have to say that on the whole the steam engine has been a pretty good thing, but then on the other hand it sure was warm yesterday in Colorado. But here's the thing I'm thinking: the worst thing you can possibly do is not try to decrease suck levels. After all, that's what the first Brotherhood 2.0 Book Club book was about.
In our lifetimes we're all gonna do things that accidently increase suck levels, but the true Nerdfighter is awesome enough to say "you know what? I've made a mistake, I increased suck levels worldwide, but I didn't mean to. I'm sorry, and I think we should change course so as to decrease suck levels in the future." Hank, that's why I'm greatful that so many people in the American government are true and awesome Nerdfighters. Oh, wait. Crap! I'll see you tomorrow.
(Brotherhood 2.0 logo)
(sings) Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday dear.... I'm gonna let Hank finish the song.
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