Jun 5th: S-S-S-Somethin From the Forum

(on lake) Good morning John, it's Tuesday June 5th.
(at home) (sigh) That was nice. Katherine and I have some friends that have a cabin up on Seeley Lake. Which is a really nice place, and Katherine and I went there this week to hang out it was awesome. It was kinda weird though for Katherine. Because she was like the only not pregnant girl. Babies babies babies. To me it does not feel like baby time yet, but a lot of my friends are having baby time.
I'm worried that if I ever have a baby, it won't have any friends. Because all of the other babies will be so much older than him. I guess that's a pretty stupid fear. Unless every body stops having the capability of having babies, which I've read two books about lately and seen one movie, so maybe it's not that far fetched. Uh, having read those books and then seeing all these pregnant people, suddenly not so worried.
Speaking of books, I just read Feed in my pants and every body was right, I don't want wikipedia in my brain, I don't want wikipedia in my brain, I don't want wikipedia brain. Idon'twantwikipediainmybrain. I don't want a wikipedia brain. Don't want a wikipedia in my brain oh my God. I found that book to be entirely terrifying. The future could be bad. Well done, good book, though it really made me a little bit more pessimistic about society and that's not necessarily something that I want. But it's really important that we recognize that these kinds of things are issues, and that we live in a very strange society. If you don't know what I'm talking about, I suggest you go buy Feed, by M. T. Anderson, it was very good.
I got an email today from The Weather Channel. They would like to interview me for a new show on global warming. It's not the kind of thing that I really expect people to watch. Stupid! There's always something on. I just wanna know what the weather is! This stupid kid's talking! That's kind of what I expect people to be saying while I'm talking. Still very cool.
You may have noticed that today's video is a little late. That is becaaaause I made a foruuuuuuuum! It took me a while. So I've been doing that all day, and a lot of last night, oh boy John, your challenges. Sometimes they wipe me out. And it's linked to, on the side bar. Or you can just go straight to the forum which is at brotherhood2.com/mypants . So when there's a discussion in the comments, or -or maybe one of us is starting a discussion in video format we can say things like, we'll continue this discussion of John McCain in my pants. Then you're not sure if the discussion is gonna happen in your pants, or if you're discussing John McCain in my pants, or if you're discussing John McCain who is in my pants, or if we're just discussing it in the forum, which is called My Pants.
It was one of my more brilliant ideas, and between you and me that is saying something. You will have to register, although that'll probably take you like 15 seconds. It's gonna replace the comments, it'll be in addition to the comments. And you don't have to go over there if you don't want to, but I'm fairly sure that some interesting things will be going on. There's already a couple of discussion threads there. One in which I discuss John McCain and lamented my saying what I said, and how I'm never actually going to vote for John McCain. Sometimes you just like to make your older brother mad at you. Poke poke poke poke. But there is also a thread about what to include in the forum. There are several sections, and several forums within sections and if you think that there should be a section or a forum, please suggest it so that I can create it. And I'm very glad to have that done with. Now I am going to go eat dinner, and it's gonna be great. I will see you tomorrow.

Brotherhood 2.0: May 18: How to Write a Book Proposal

Good morning Hank, it's Friday, May 18th, the day that I leave for my trip to the Netherlands. The Yeti and I are going to the Netherlands to support my new novel, 19 Kier Katherine, which I'm sure I'm pronouncing extraordinarily well. I'm really excited about my trip to the Netherlands; I was supposed to go in March, but I got the orbital cellulitis so I couldn't, but now we are definitely going, unless I get orbital cellulitis again. Hank, this means that possibly I'll get to meet some brotherhood 2.0 viewers who live in the Netherlands, cross your fingers, maybe even Toobias! Too-bee-as..? Too-bye-as? Hmmm. I'm not very good at pronunciation. Speaking of pronunciation, Hank, it may seem like you pretty well schooled me on the pronunciation of wikipedia. I mean, you certainly have a lot of fact-based evidence to support your assertion that wikipedia is supposed to be pronounced wickypedia or whatever. I can't even pronounce it the way you pronounce it, my tongue doesn't make those movements. I may not have facts on my side, Hank, but I still think I'm right, that's the American way. And, really, what kind of evidence do you have? I mean, you have wikipedia, a known fraudulent source, and you have a girl robot voice saying wickypedia. Big deal. I can get a girl robot voice to say it my way. Sarah! Sarah?
The Yeti (off camera): Yeah?
Can you come in here? Can you say wikipedia in a robot voice? Come on, wikipedia in a robot voice.
The Yeti: Wikipedia.
In a robot voice!
The Yeti: Wi-ki-pedia.
See? Girl robot voice saying wikipedia. Checkmate. Speaking of wikipedia, I'm trying, I don't know if you know this but your wikipedia entry has been - oh, dammit - I don't know if you know this, but your wi-kee-pedia entry has been the subject of repeated acts of vandalism. Many people have changed your wikipedia entry to say, quote, "he is a gay". But one person went further than that, and said a lot of truly offensive things that I can't repeat on this vlog because of the sensitive ears of our younger listeners. I would, however, like to share with you a couple of quick sentences from the vandalism. Quote: "Both him and his brother John and gay" Period. Ummm, do you mean "both he and his brother John are gay"? Because if you're gonna vandalise wikipedia, you should do it with some reverence for the English language. The next sentence reads "John Greens wife is a trans" Period. There's no apostrophe in the Green's, by the way.
Commenter Misu, or My-zu, or Mitsu, I don't know how to pronounce anything, says "I don't care about how you actually go about making a fiction book proposal, all I care about is that you make the proposal using puppets." MisuMyzuMitsu, I can't necessarily make the proposal using puppets, but I can tell Hank about how to make a fiction book proposal using puppets.
Okay, Hank, today we have playing the role of my lovely editor, Julie Strauss-Gable: Mr. Argyle.
Julie Puppet: Hey, how are you guys? Good to see you again. Okay.
And playing the role of me, we have our old friend, Oobie.
John Puppet: Hey fellas. Okay, uhh, okay Julie. We're just gonna start out by talking a little bit about a fiction book proposal.
Julie Puppet: Umm, you're not doing a very good job of moving your hands right when you talk.
John Puppet: I know, I know, I'm not.. um, I'm not a puppeteer.
Julie Puppet: My husband is a puppeteer.
John Puppet: I know. But I couldn't get him on such short notice, because, um, we're going to the Netherlands. Can we just- Can we just get on with the thing?
Julie Puppet: Yeah yeah yeah, very rarely do you see a first novel sell on a proposal, they almost always have to have the finished manuscript.
John Puppet: Right. I finished the manuscript of Looking for Alaska.
Julie Puppet: Yeah, but then when it came time for you to create an Abundance of Katherines, I said why don't you send me a proposal? And you were like-
John Puppet: I don't know what a proposal is, I'm just a little Oobie!
Julie Puppet: Exactly. And I told you that a proposal is basic-
Sorry puppet fans, I'm gonna run out of time. Hank, basically all you need is a plot summary, a list of the characters and then sample chapters so they know what the book is actually about and is gonna sound like. Alright, I really gotta go to the airport, Hank. I'll see you on Monday.
(Brotherhood 2.0 logo)
The Yeti: Did uhhh, you say happy birthday Katherine?
Happy birthday Katherine!

May 17th: Wikeeeeeepedia... and Happy Birthday Katherine

Good Morning John, it's Thursday, May 17th.
(blows party blowers in a tune)
(Sings) Katherine, it's your birthday. Happy Birthday, Katherine. Katherine, it's your birthday. doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo, AHHHH! That's right, it's Katherine Green's birthday. Happy birthday Katherine! We're the same age again! Every year, for 12 days, we are different ages, and it just throws me completely off. No, it doesn't. It doesn't really. Anyway, I have to do this video quickly, because Katherine has birthday needs to attend to. For example, we're having a party tonight, and I'd rather if she didn't have to clean the house in preparation for the party. That would just be lame, to have to clean up for your own birthday party.
So Katherine doesn't know what she's getting yet, aside from a France-themed birthday party. So I can't actually tell you what she's getting, because she's going to watch this before she gets it, and that would ruin the surprise! I'm excited about the party, but we have some other things to attend to.
First, as for the proposed book proposals, I have no idea how to write a book proposal for a fiction book. Right now, all I have is stories in my head, and they're getting better and funner and more, like, cool and sort of intense, so I'm excited about that, but, y'know. How do you propose fiction? Do you, like, make the list of characters and propose situations and talk abou- I- I don't know. It's- It's a mystery to me. I need your help. I feel like it's something that you must know. Maybe you've even done that before.
Second, wiki. The word wiki is a word for a collaborative website, and it is pronounced wicky. Wikipedia is a mix of the words wiki and encyclopaedia. If the mix occurred at the -opedia and the wik-, then you would have wik-a-pedia. But the mix occurs after wiki and then -pedia, so you have wiki-pedia. I AM RIGHT ABOUT THIS. I've been wrong about many things in my life. Once, during a presentation on the renaissance, I pronounced façade 'fake-ade'. I was wrong. But about wikipedia, I am right.
I went to the wikipedia page on wikipedia, and if wikipedia is right about anything, it's right about itself. Pronunciations of wikipedia include: wickypedia and weekypedia. Those are the two pronunciations of wikipedia. Not wick-ih-pedia, not wick-uh-pedia. Wickypedia. There were people in the comments who were changing the way that they pronounce wikipedia because you were wrong. In fact, they have a button you can click, to hear someone pronouncing the word wikipedia, and that person pronounces it:
(computerised female voice) wickypedia.
I mean, this is an interesting side-effect of text-based communication. When you only read words, you never find out how they're actually pronounced. But, because we're not using text-based communication any more, I get to find out when you're wrong, and thus I can correct you, and rub your face all in it. So say it with me, John: Wickypedia. I'll see you tomorrow.

Brotherhood 2.0: May 16: Beating the EBO into the ground

Good morning Hank, it's Wednesday, May 16th. You may notice that the puff level is a little high. There's so much puff on the sides, Hank! Puff! Puff! It reminds me of when I was in high school and they called me muffin.

Hank, I don't know if you can see the beads of sweat dripping down my forehead, but it's been a long day here in New York City, it's hot, and I've spent the day reading the screenplay of the Looking for Alaska movie, or as it's known in Hollywood, 'Famous Last Words'. They're changing the title of the movie because, y'know, Looking for Alaska sounds like it's a movie about mountaineering, or something. Anyway Hank, I think it's a pretty good screenplay, even though it's way different from the book, and let's just keep our fingers crossed that they make it.

Hank, even though so far as I can tell we haven't gotten official permission from Evil Baby Orphanage creator Brooke to make it into a movie/book/graphic novel/we don't know what yet, I think we should move ahead with the project. Unfortunately it's hard to write collaboratively about something when you're not allowed to communicate via text, so I'm going to propose that we discuss the Evil Baby Orphanage in video blogs. But obviously, we can't do it in the brotherhood 2.0 video blogs, so I propose that we make a series of Evil Baby Orphanage videos in which we're reading to each other from our proposed book proposals- is that grammatically correct? I'm gonna go with it, and then eventually we'll create a book proposal out of the things we're reading to each other. That shouldn't be too hard, right? I mean, we don't need text any more. Text is dead. Just kidding. I miss text so bad, Hank. I miss it, I miss it, I miss it. Sometimes I'll open up the instant message window, and I'll make it say BrokenGolfClub, and I'll just have it sitting there and I'll type into it, but I won't hit enter so I don't break the rules. Hey, I just told everyone what your screen name is!
Now obviously the Nerdfighters have to have access to the evil baby orphanage videos, so I'm going to propose that we also post them on brotherhood 2.0 over the weekends, if and when we actually do this. Okay? Okay. Moving on. Oh wait, before we move on, can I just say one thing? An Evil BABY Orphanage does have to contain evil babies, but babies grow up, and what they grow up into is teenagers, who become kind of, maybe, evil baby junior counsellors. Y'know, they gotta take care of the evil babies, they've gotta change the evil diapers, et cetera. And what would it be like, Hank, to be 14 or 15 years old and all of a sudden realise that the reason you're on this mountaintop school in Canada and never allowed to leave campus is because you are an evil baby from the past? I'm just saying, I think it might be interesting.
Okay, really moving on now. Hank, in your last video you correctly pointed out that I was born in the city of Indianapolis, the city I'm moving back to. You incorrectly said that I lived there until I was three. In point of fact, I lived there until I was three weeks old. Hank, I know that you have a limited knowledge of my early years, due to the fact that you weren't alive for them. But don't you remember how we lived in Michigan, and then moved to Birmingham, and how you were born in Birmingham, and how then we moved to Florida? Jeeeeez.
Anyway Hank, eventually you won't have to remember that I left Indianapolis when I was three weeks old, because all that stuff will be covered on my Wikipedia page, or as you like to call it, Wee-kee-pedia. Come on, Hank, this isn't Canada, say it with me: Wi-ki-pedia. It's not quite there yet, but it's getting there. Hank, I'll see you tomorrow.
(Brotherhood 2.0 Logo) P.S. Hank, the Yeti just officially became a Master. Look at these awesome pictures I took! My gosh, I'm like Ansel Adams, only, y'know, drunk. Forget the video blog, Hank, I'm going into professional distance photography.

May 15th: A Bit More EBO and Wikipedia

(Hank presses play on every video on the B2.0 Homepage) Aaaaaaaaahhh! Good morning John, it’s Tuesday, May 15th. One of the Nerdfighters told me to try that. It was amazing.
Congratulations on buying a house! I know that it’s not final, but they accepted your offer. And now you have to go through all of the horrible process of actually buying a house. That’s very exciting. Congratulations. I can’t wait to visit it and you in Indianapolis, Indiana. Does everybody know that you grew up in Indianapolis, Indiana? That you lived there until you were, like, three? Because I don’t feel like you’ve mentioned that, but I think it’s kind of strange. I mean, of all the places in the world to return to, after living in Alabama and Chicago and New York; always saying that you were going to back to Alabama, but now you’re going back to where you came from. Indianapolis- a place I’m pretty sure you hated. You were three, but I think you hated it.
On to more important matters: Evil Baby Orphanage. I really think there’s only one option: We have to do this. And I believe that we must officially ask permission of the Nerdfighters. To Brooke, who conceived this idea, and all of the other Nerdfighters that have been putting their brains to the task: can John and I run with this? Can we try and do something with the Evil Baby Orphanage idea? I mean, I’m not saying that there’s going to be a book out by Hank and John Green called “Evil Baby Orphanage”, but I think it’s pretty fertile ground for storytelling. So I’m asking permission, nicely this time. Next time won’t be so nice. I’ll be groveling at your feet, begging and pleading and kissing you on parts and donating money to your favorite charities. Because you’re amazing, and it’s a hilarious idea, and we like it, and we wanna work on it. Let us know if that’s ok with you.
And as for Wikipedia, I’m on Wikipedia! Oh my God! I feel so important! I type in my name and there I am, telling people about stuff that I do! There’s been a little bit of conversation in the comments about Wikipedia as a source of information. There’s obviously different ways to use Wikipedia. It’s huge, it’s great, it has a lot of amazing information; but at the same time sometimes it’s vandalized, things go wrong.
For example, I once went to Russell Crowe’s page. Please don’t ask me why. And the first line about Russell Crowe read as follows: “Russell Ira Crowe is an Academy Award winning New Zealand-Australian actor, and is a gay.” So obviously there are flaws in the idea of Wikipedia. Anybody can edit, you don’t even have to sign-up, you can just write whatever you want. But I was able to click edit, and I removed “is a gay”, and now people looking for information on Russell Crowe will be completely happy with what they find. I actually really believe in the idea of Wikipedia and I am thrilled to be there among the million other articles about important and unimportant things. And to be on there is another amazing, excellent gift that you and the Nerdfighters have given me. Thank you all so much. I’ll see you tomorrow.

Brotherhood 2.0: May 14: The Evil Baby Orphanage

3 librarians: Good morning Hank!
(shows business card cube) Hank look what the, uh, librarians in Baltimore did. It's Monday, May 14th. Hank, your video on Friday prompted an intense discussion in the comment section of brotherhood2.com.
The specific question at hand: whether or not the Nerdfighters should build a time machine and go back in time and kill Baby Hitler. Hank, when it comes to Baby Hitler killing, people tend to fall into one of two camps. The first camp says, we shouldn't kill the Baby Hitler, he's just a baby, he's not even evil yet, he hasn't killed anyone. The other camp of people say, are you crazy? What the hell are you talking about? We need to go back in time and kill Baby Hitler! I tend to side with those people. I have to say Hank, there's just something about killing the Baby Hitler that appeals to me.
Hank, it seemed that the two camps, pro-Baby Hitler killing and anti-Baby Hitler killing, would never be able to reconcile. And that there would be a split among the Nerdfighters that could possibly lead to a Nerdfighter civil war! But then along came commenter Brooke, who suggested The Evil Baby Orphanage.
OH! MY! GOD!
Hank, The Evil Baby Orphanage is such a good idea; I don't understand how no one thought of it before! The idea is simple. We go back in time, and we don’t kill all the evil babies, we just take them out of their crappy homes and then we take them to like a mountain in Tibet or something where we raise them up to be heroic Nerdfighter babies! Hank, something has to be done with this Evil Baby Orphanage idea, but I don’t know what to do with it. Hopefully you or someone else will have good ideas.
In other news: Hank, I would like to read to you from a deleted portion of the Wikipedia entry for An Abundance of Katherines. "The novel start with James Lloyd, an un-charismatic young actor who is considering leaving behind his career in London and moving to America. By moving he also hopes to leave behind Katherine, a girl he has long had feelings for but who repeatedly turned him down. While his career grows in strength, he begins to cautiously experiment in homosexuality with some of the other cast members of the film he is working on." Hank, uh, that sounds like a fairly good book, but it doesn't sound like the book I wrote.
Hank after I discovered this entirely fictional and extremely odd plot summary of An Abundance of Katherines, I started to look around Wikipedia for more information about you and about me. And, you know what I found? Not much! In fact, Hank, the entry in the lonelygirl15 Wikipedia about me is more informative in many ways than the entry in the actual Wikipedia. But you know what's even worse than the fictional Wikipedia entry about An Abundance of Katherines? The fact that there is no entry whatsoever about Hank Green! Can you believe it?! Wikipedia has never even tried to fathom the inky blue depths of Hank Green's genius! Hank, that is not acceptable. And with the help of the Nerdfighters, I'm gonna do something about it! We're making you a Wikipedia entry because you've earned it big guy. And hopefully also some people will improve the entries for me and for Looking for Alaska and for An Abundance of Katherines.
That's what Wikipedia is all about. It's about brothers creating Wikipedia entries for brothers. Right? Isn't that what it's about? Hank, I'll see you tomorrow.
(Brotherhood 2.0 logo) P.S. Hank I don't know if you realized this but in the last week we've raised more than 300 dollars for Randy's family. And we'll be collecting donations all this week.

Brotherhood 2.0: February 21, 2007: The Wikipedia in Your Mind

Good morning, Hank. It’s Wednesday, February 21st: Ash Wednesday. I hope that you’re going to church today. Just kidding, you heathen. What are you giving up for Lent, Hank? I’m giving up all foods that taste good. Oh, wait, I already, yeah, hmmm.
Hank, after watching your vlog entry yesterday, two separate commenters, Elizabeth and Carrie Jones, both said that it reminded them of the M. T. Anderson novel, Feed. So, Feed imagines this world where the internet is hardwired into your brain when you’re a baby, and the result of this is that you become sort of mindlessly consumeristic, as opposed to the current state of the world, wherein the internet is not hardwired into your brain and you become sort of mindlessly consumeristic.
Now, obviously, having the entire internet slash television hardwired into your brain when you’re an infant is a bad idea, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that having Wikipedia (pronounced wih kih pee dee uh) inside your brain is a bad idea. In fact, I would have to argue that having Wikipedia inside your brain would be sort of awesome. Uh, the only problem is that you don’t want to have a Wikipedia that can be edited by anyone inside your brain. Like, say that there’s a girl. (Talks off camera to The Yeti) What should we call the girl? Huh? Oh, Sarah! There’s a girl named Sarah.
The Yeti: I don’t know. Is the story good or bad?
John: Can you hear the voice of the yeti? Can you hear the voice of the yeti? She just spoke. Say there’s a girl named Sarah, and you really love her. And you think that she’s awesome and beautiful, and she just got a new haircut and it’s amazing, and, plus, you’re married to her. When you go to Wikipedia, and you type in “the yeti,” or “Sarah Green,” you should see a picture of Sarah and you should just be like, “Wow, is she awesome.” And then the Wikipedia entry will be about all the ways that she’s awesome and all the wonderful things that she’s done over the years and all of her amazing talents and that kind of thing.
Now, say that there’s another girl. Hmm…Julie Baskin, my fourth-grade girlfriend. And let’s say that Julie Baskin still holds a candle for me, which is perfectly possible because, let’s face it, I was a very charming fourth-grader. So, say that Julie Baskin goes in and edits the Wikipedia in my brain, and then when I go look up “the yeti,” it says “horrible monster who lives in the Himalayas, huge, hairy, terrifying!” Well, I don’t want to be married to a huge, hairy, terrifying, horrible monster, particularly not a possibly fictional one. So, all the sudden, I would stop loving Sarah, not because I don’t love her—of course I do!—but because Julie Baskin edited the Wikipedia in my mind.
So, it needs to be a Wikipedia that can only be edited by experts whom you trust. And that, of course, is the start of every dystopian novel, because then there’s the experts whom you trust, and they form the Revolutionary Council, and then all of the sudden you’re in Iran and they’re developing nuclear weapons. Hank, I’ll see you tomorrow.

Brotherhood 2.0: February 20th: Computer Trouble

Good morning, John. It’s Tuesday, February 20th. Why do we always say good morning? It’s never morning when I do this; it’s never morning when you see this. It’s 2:18 here; that means it’s four o’clock there. Jesus, I need to get crackin’.
(shot of dismantled computer) So, the reason my life sucks is somewhere in here. I purchased three computers (holds up 3 fingers) in the last week. Two of them (holds up 2 fingers) went back to Best Buy. One of them (one finger) I knew I was going to take back. The other one (adds second finger) didn’t have a second hard drive bay! What kind of fancy new computer doesn’t have a second hard drive bay?
(Shot of Hank lying near dismantled computer) Anyhow, the good news is this puppy’s working now, and it’s working for you, John Green. This is weird. It looks like I’m part of the machine. Like I’ve suddenly become the third hard drive. Wouldn’t it be awesome if Wikipedia (pronounced wee-kee-pee-dee-uh) could be in your brain. I know kung fu!
Anyway, this computer, now that it’s working, has been helping me do some Brotherhood 2.0 projects. Most importantly, we have our MySpace page, which people are definitely already finding out about because we already have, like, 69 friends. I don’t know how that happened so fast! You posted a little thing on sparksflyup and, boom! Okay, I sent a bulletin to all my friends, too. But it’s very exciting; I’m glad to have friends. Not that I didn’t think that I had friends before; not that I wasn’t appreciative of our Brotherhood 2.0 viewers before. Hopefully we’ve become gigantic on MySpace and then all the MySpace people will become our friends. I’m going crazy about what my eyebrows are doing right now (raises eyebrows with sound of voice). Woo!
Trying to get back into the swing of things here in Montana, but I haven’t been able to because none of my computers work! And my swings dependent upon computers. They’ve thrown of my groove. They’ve thrown off my groove! Anyways, I am absolutely amazed at the response to my survey. That survey post has over 53 comments, and over half of those are surveys. And then, on top of that, there’s surveys on Brotherhood2.com, there’s surveys on other posts, there’s surveys on people’s websites, there’s audio surveys, there’s video surveys. Speaking of which, who the heck is Tom? John, I did not know that we had a secret brother named Tom! He seems like a really nice guy, though. “Hey, I’m Tom. I’m your third brother. You’ve never met me or heard of me, but I have a degree in chemical engineering and a wife and some kids. Surprise!”
To add to my computer frustrations, iMovie keeps locking up before I save because I’m stupid and I haven’t been saving. So I’m just going to do this and finish and say bye because I need to eat something and (through teeth) this is annoying. I’ll see you tomorrow!