July 26: The Price of Fame

(plays guitar) Good morning John, it's Thursday, July 26th. And hello to our new viewers! Welcome. This is Brotherhood 2.0. (lunchbox on head) Sometimes we put stuff on our heads. (zips closed over face) (coughs) It smelled funny in there. It's been a little bit difficult for me to stop doing my happy dance lately. I'm out, at the store, and I'm doing my happy dance. I'm walking down the street and I'm doing my happy dance. I'm in the shower and I'm doing my happy dance even though it's really dangerous because there's no traction in my tub. And that could really- it could- it could turn bad. It could turn bad. For those of you who've never seen it, I just did my happy dance a little while ago and I caught it on camera so here it is. (Happy dances)
It's excellent aerobic exercise. I think that everybody knows why I've been doing my happy dance. But if not, just go onto the front page of YouTube and on there you will see me. Looking. Out. From the front page of YouTube from a little square. Aksio akio ashio assio oshkosh bigokio Deathly Hallows has been featured on the front page of YouTube! And it's been watched over 200 thousand times! 200 thousand times!
Now I know what you're all thinking. You're thinking Hank, it's really great that you were featured on the front page of YouTube. I'm- I'm happy for you. But what is the price of YouTube fame? The price is that for every 100 views your video gets there will be one comment. And when there aren't very many comments you can take them each individually and they seem lovely. And occasionally annoying. But when there are 2000 of them they start to take shape and it's a shape kind of like this (bell curve) and while this nice bell curve at the top you have lots of people being very nice you also have these two extremes. In which people are either being way too mean, or way too nice.
A sample of a comment from each section would be something like this. (starting at mean side of bell curve, moving to nice) You have: Yr Gay, Yr Gay, But yr funny, Cool video, Laughing my ass off, yr a fricken genius!, and please let me have your babies. The strange this is that when you have a big sample like this every person sees it very differently. For example your mom will see this (graph with only Cool Video Well Done :-) and LMAO, Yr a GENIUS) Whereas your wife will see this (graph with only pleaaaese let me have your babies) and you, yourself, will see this (graph with only Yr Gay and Yr Gay, But that was Funny). So in the end it becomes kind of a very stressful thing. It feels like half the people are saying you're gay, and half the people want you to have their babies. I imagine I don't have to point at the irony here. But in either case your wife is upset! But I've been able to temper it. I've been able to see that most people are just being very nice and supportive. If I can just shave off the people who either want to be my girlfriend or want me to get a girlfriend, then I can just- I can be happy.
And when they're not saying that I pronounced Accio or Akio wrong, which fine, I did, it's nice. It's pleasant. The people are very cool. Ahem, the people are very jokes. Um, yes, I do think that it would be jokes if we used the word jokes instead of jokes whenever we said jokes. I mean, I think it would be cool if we said the word jokes instead of cool every time we said the word cool.
John I'm glad you're feeling better and I will see you tomorrow.

July 25: Brotherhood 2.0's Youtube Comments Are Answered!

So Hank this morning the first thing I did was I got up and I went to look at YouTube, uh, and I was like, well that's weird, I don't usually see Hank's face on the front page of YouTube. That's a little- OH MY GOD WE GOT FEATURED! Good morning Hank, it's Thursday, July 25th. Hank you're getting so many comments that there's no way you can respond to all of them. So, uh, I'm going to do it for you. Until my four minute deadline I'm going to read and answer as many YouTube comments as I can. Hank, I know you're wondering, you're wondering how am I gonna know, John, if it's you or if it's a YouTuber when you're reading? The answer is that when it's a YouTuber I'm not going to have green hair, and when it's me I am going to have green hair.
(YouTuber) LOL what a sexy geek!
Actually he's a sexy nerd, but that's a common mistake.
(YouTuber) It's assio not akio. No it's ahkio not akio. No it's not, dumbass, it's ashio not akio. No it's ahkio,  no it's akio, no it's oshkosh b'gosh!
OK, once and for all it's assio stop bothering him!
(YouTuber) You guys look like the Proclaimers.
Really? Did the Proclaimers have green hair?
(YouTuber) Who ever made this is a nerd.
Yes, that's the idea. We're nerds.
(YouTuber) Funny but could you look any dorkier?
Yes he could look dorkier. He could have spotty green hair.
(YouTuber) Why are dogs scared of vacuums but not of peanut butter faces?
That's a really good question. Maybe it's because vacuums are scary whereas peanut butter faces are made of awesome.
Nigeliscool657 writes: get a life, nerd.
Your screen name is Nigeliscool657, did 656 people before you have the screen name Nigeliscool? Furthermore to best of my knowledge no one in human history who is cool has ever had the screen name blank is cool ergo you are a Nerdfighter, sorry, live with it. It's a good thing.
(YouTuber) What's a Nerdfighter?
A Nerdfigher is like a regular person except instead of being composed out of, like, tissues and cells and organs, they're made out of awesome. Nerdfighters do stuff like hang out at the Brotherhood 2.0 forum, My Pants and uh, (image of pillow) embroider pillows. Hank look at those embroidered pillows! They even put my pants on them!
(YouTuber) This was so jokes. You have real skills.
Uh, this isn't really a response to that comment, but wouldn't it be great if instead of saying cool we always said jokes? Yeah, we just got featured on the front page of YouTube, it was pretty jokes. Man, the mountain goats are so jokes. Hey is it hot outside? No, it's pretty jokes.
(YouTuber) Umm, can you say obsession? Oh right, that's what you are. Cough cough. Get a life.
Uh, when you say cough cough get a life do you mean cough get a life cough? Because (coughs) get a life isn't funny, but (cough)get a life(cough) that's funny.
Pisstaker writes: Geek.
Your screen name is Pisstaker and you called Hank a geek? Um, I have a couple problems with the screen name Pisstaker. The big one is this: who isn't a piss taker? Like, how does being a piss taker set you apart from the crowd?
Kush45 writes: Got anything better to do? Like make some money? Get a job? Harry Potter doesn't care about you cuz he's not real.
Harry Potter isn't real? Oh no! Wait, wait, what do you mean by real? Is this video blog real? Am I real if you can see me and hear me, but only through the internet? Are you real if I can read your comment but I don't know who you are or what your name is or where you're from or what you look like or how old you are? I know all of those things about Harry Potter. Maybe Harry Potter's real and you're not.
Rustyjusty123 asks: can I put your face on the MySpace?
I've heard a lot about the MySpace and I think it would be fine if you put Hank's picture on the MySpace.
(YouTuber) Wow, he's 27. He looks like my little brother. My little brother's ten.
He looks like my little brother too, and I think he's awesome!
So that's all the questions I can get through. Hank congratulations. I don't even know how to celebrate I'm so happy. I think I'm gonna put silly string in my hair and then do my happy dance. (sprays) The Yeti is going to be really mad when she gets home and sees the carpet! Happy dance time! (dances) YES! Hank, I'll see you tomorrow.