Brotherhood 2.0: January 23rd

(Hank is sitting on a black couch in front of a fireplace with a wine glass full of liquid and a coat on.)
Good morning John. It's Tuesday, January 23rd. (Blows on drink in glass) If you're wondering why I'm blowing on my wine, it's because its tea. But I needed something that I could toast with. Congratulations on your Printz nomination. I wasn't excited enough, I need to be more excited about that. (Does Happy Dance) (Toasts) To the Printz Award! To An Abundance of Katherines! To Katherines! There's one sitting right here. She's waving. To silver metals! To not quite doing as good as you did the last time!
Sorry, that was kinda mean.
So I was in a bookstore today and the lady came up to me and said, you're John Green's brother. Oh-Ho!
So it turns out that I'm famous now. Well, she might very well be your biggest fan. She has a section of her bookstore devoted entirely to you. In fact, there are several sections in her book store devoted entirely to you. Well they're all kind of small. She had heard you won the Printz Prize. (Does Happy Dance) I don't know what you're gonna do with all of them man. You're just rackin' 'em up. What do you do with two Printz Awards? Do you actually get a thing? Do you get, like, a statue? (high pitched voice) eh congratulations! Or do you just, ya know, every single one of your books get a sticker on it. Which is cool. I like the sticker, I think the sticker is good. Or do you just get more money? Do they give you more money? Is there any, ya know, reward?
Now there's something that I wanted to talk to you about. When you recieved the information that you were getting the Printz Award, one of the things that you did not do, was your Happy Dance. Is your Happy Dance actually your Happy Dance? Or are you just trying to entertain us? Because if you're just trying to entertain us, then this thing isn't real, man, and it has to be real! Or you know, it could be fake. We could start faking things, and that might be interesting. For example, I generally sit by the fire, with a glass of wine... in my girlfriend's coat...
Katherine: Girlfriend?
Hank: Girlfriend (laughs) Yes...girlfriend's coat. We aren't married 'cause this is fake time. I'm lying about things. Obviously. So I was recently at your friend Maureen Johnson's blog. She discussed a long conversation which you and Johnson and Lockheart had, concerning the suffix, "in your pants." It turns out that every book title, becomes better when you add "in your pants" to the end of the title. I'm going to go around this lovely cabin and find books.
The Dance of the Dissident Daugher in Your Pants! Present Moment, Wonderful Moment in Your Pants. Stumbling on Happiness in Your Pants. The Left Hand of Darkness in Your Pants. The Student Bible in Your Pants.
(Shows Hank's torso and pants. opens coat, undoes fly, pulls The Student Bible out of his pants)
(back to Hank) Yeah... So...I'll see you tomorrow.
And I know that you don't personally know this, but Katherines in your pants is actually quite a nice thing. I don't know about an abundance of Katherines... I promise, I don't. But one Katherine in my pants... is quite nice.